Some Thoughts on Marriage

Post-Bible Study conversation lead to me thinking about a notion surrounding marriage that seems fairly popular in contemporary Christianity. Packaged into many marriage ceremonies recently is the idea that marriage involves the bringing together of two families.

I can see where the argument from Scripture for this idea is developed. Biblical narratives of marriage (aside from metaphorical use) is entirely in the Old Testament. In these cases, there are instances where, upon marriage, the newlyweds lived with the woman's family. Take for example, Moses and Jacob. Both lived with their in-laws for an extended time after their marriage.

Further, normative behavior in Scripture is not necessarily prescriptive. Sin, for example, is fairly normative behavior in Scripture but is by no means condoned. And, I cannot think of an example in Scripture where two families joined together. When Moses and Jacob live with their in-laws, it is because they are not welcome with their own families.

I would argue that the more significant ethic of marriage in Scripture is the "leave and cleave" of Genesis 2. And in fact, an emphasis on joining two families together can get in the way of the practical implementation of becoming one flesh.

Becoming one flesh is a clearly taught theological principle that is foundational for gender relationships. Any notion of joining families together is developed from narrative—narrative that is not interpreted to mean such things, nor is it written in such a way as to draw out this element.

This is incredibly half-baked, but if true, quite important. Prove me wrong? I welcome it, lest I become increasingly heretical.